Beatitudes For Those Who Comfort
Blessed are those who do not use tears to measure the true feelings of the bereaved.
Blessed are those who stifle the urge to say, “I understand”, when they don’t.
Blessed are those who do not expect the bereaved to put in the past someone who is still fresh in their hearts.
Blessed are those who do not have a quick “comforting” answer, preach a sermon, or continually quote scripture after scripture verse to the bereaved in an effort to make them “better”.
Blessed are those who do not make judgments on the bereaved’s closeness to God by their reaction to the loss of their loved one.
Blessed are those who listen with their hearts, not with their minds.
Blessed are those who allow the bereaved enough time to heal.
Blessed are those who put their uncomfortableness aside to walk with the bereaved.
Blessed are those who do not give unwanted advice.
Blessed are those who understand the worth of each person as a unique individual and do not suggest they can be replaced or forgotten.
Blessed are those who continue to call, visit, and reach out when the crowd has dwindled and the wounded are left standing alone.
Blessed are those who realize the fragility of bereavement and offer the bereaved a loving shoulder to cry on and a compassionate heart.
Jackie Deems
copyright 1989
I wrote these Beatitudes after losing my son to a terminal illness and suffering 2 miscarriages. As a facilitator of a bereavement support group for 17 years, I have found them to be helpful to those who would be comforters.
